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Q:

What are some gentle discipline strategies for dealing with lying or dishonesty?

Hi everyone,

I am a parent of a 7-year-old boy who has recently started lying to me about small things like finishing his homework or finishing his broccoli during mealtime. I am trying to implement gentle discipline strategies because I don't want to be too harsh on him, but I also want him to understand that lying is not okay. Can anyone recommend some gentle discipline strategies for dealing with lying or dishonesty in children? Thank you so much in advance for your help!

All Replies

madison50

Hi there,

I had a similar experience with my 6-year-old daughter who started lying about small things. I found that one of the best gentle discipline strategies was to focus on building a positive and trusting relationship with her. Spending quality time together and listening to her thoughts and feelings helped to create a safe space where she felt comfortable telling the truth.

Another strategy that worked well for me was to set clear expectations and boundaries. I made it clear to my daughter that it's not okay to lie, but I also gave her the chance to explain herself and tell her side of the story.

In addition, I found that positive reinforcement was very effective. Praising her for telling the truth, even when it was difficult, helped her to feel proud of being honest and to understand that honesty was important to me.

Overall, I believe that gentle discipline strategies are effective in dealing with lying and dishonesty in children. It takes time and patience, but building trust, setting clear boundaries, and offering positive reinforcement can go a long way in helping our children develop into honest and responsible individuals.

luz25

Hello everyone,

I can relate to this topic as I had a similar experience with my 12-year-old son who was lying about his activities outside of the house. One of the gentle discipline strategies that worked for us was to approach the situation with empathy and understanding.

Instead of getting angry and accusing him of lying, I tried to see things from his perspective and find out why he felt the need to lie. This allowed me to address the underlying issues and help him come up with better solutions to the problems he faced.

Another strategy that worked for us was to be consistent with our responses to lying. We would always respond with calmness, respect, and consequence when necessary. This helped him to understand that being dishonest has consequences, but he could still trust us to love and support him.

Lastly, we worked on building trust by being open and honest ourselves. We shared stories from our own lives about the consequences of lies, this helped him to relate and understand that honesty is a critical life value.

In summary, using empathy and understanding, consistency in the response to lying, and being open about the importance of honesty are effective gentle discipline strategies for dealing with lying in older children.

ptorphy

Hello,

I had a similar experience with my 5-year-old son who started lying about the tiniest things. I noticed that whenever I confronted him about his lies, he became defensive and it was hard for me to get through to him. So, I started using a gentle discipline strategy that involved asking open-ended questions.

For example, if my son lied about brushing his teeth, I would ask him "Why do you think it's important to brush your teeth before bed?" This allowed him to reflect on his actions and understand why it's important to tell the truth. It also helped me to better understand his thought process and correct any misunderstandings.

Another gentle discipline strategy that worked well for me was to use positive reinforcement when my son was honest. I would say things like "Thank you for telling me the truth, I appreciate it" to encourage him to continue being honest.

Lastly, I made sure to model honesty myself by admitting my mistakes and apologizing when I was wrong. Children learn by example, so being a good role model is essential.

In summary, using open-ended questions, positive reinforcement, and modeling honesty are effective gentle discipline strategies for dealing with lying in children.

braulio54

Hi there,

I had a similar experience with my 9-year-old daughter who was lying about her performance in school. One of the gentle discipline strategies that worked for us was to make honesty a part of our family's values. We talked about the importance of being honest and how it can affect our relationships with others.

Another strategy that worked well for us was to use storytelling to teach the value of honesty. We read books and watched movies with characters who faced the consequences of their lies, and discussed the lessons learned from them.

We also made sure to give our daughter the opportunity to explain her actions and tell her side of the story without feeling judged or criticized. This helped her to understand that we will always listen to her and give her the chance to make things right.

Lastly, we found that consistent communication and follow-through was key to reinforcing our values. We made sure to ask our daughter about her day and how she felt about her performance in school, which helped her to be more honest about her struggles.

In conclusion, instilling the value of honesty, using storytelling, giving the child a chance to explain themselves, and consistent communication are all effective gentle discipline strategies for dealing with lying in children.

mcdermott.arlie

Hi there,

I can totally relate to your situation as I went through the same thing with my 8-year-old daughter. I learned that one of the most effective gentle discipline strategies for dealing with lying is to have an open and honest conversation about it with the child. Talking to them calmly and respectfully helps to build trust and understanding between you and your child.

Another gentle discipline strategy that worked for me was to implement natural consequences. For example, if my daughter lied about finishing her homework, then she wouldn't be able to watch her favorite TV show that evening. This way, she learned that there are consequences to her actions and she started to take responsibility for her behavior.

Lastly, I noticed that praising my daughter when she told the truth, even if it wasn't what I wanted to hear, encouraged her to be more honest in the future. I hope these strategies work for you too. Good luck!

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