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Are there any particular considerations I should keep in mind when choosing a fertility clinic or sperm/egg donor as a queer parent?

Hi everyone. I am a queer individual planning to start a family soon. As you can imagine, the process of finding a fertility clinic and a sperm or egg donor is quite daunting.

I understand that the process may differ for queer individuals, and I want to ensure that I make an informed decision while choosing the right clinic and donor for myself and my partner.

Can anyone please share their experiences or offer any advice on what particular considerations I should keep in mind when choosing a fertility clinic or sperm/egg donor as a queer parent? Any recommendations or good resources that I should check out would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

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Hello there. I would like to add to the conversation as a queer parent who has gone through the process of choosing a fertility clinic and donor. One thing to consider is the location of the clinic. Depending on where you live or your accessibility, it may be easier to choose a clinic that is closer to you. This can help simplify the process, especially if you need to go to the clinic for testing or procedures.

Another factor to consider is the clinic’s attitude towards diversity, inclusivity, and intersectionality, to ensure that your experiences and identities are centered in the process. As a queer person, I found it important to choose a clinic that was welcoming and affirming, and that respected my chosen family structure.

It’s also helpful to consider the legalities and logistics, especially if your fertility treatment crosses state lines or international borders. It's important to take the time to understand the legal and cultural implications of your fertility treatment, as laws vary across regions, states, and countries. This may help you avoid complications, and ensure greater security in the short and long term.

Finally, trust your instincts throughout the process. If something doesn’t feel right or comfortable, don’t hesitate to voice your concerns, get clarification or look for further options. The right clinic and donor are out there, and the journey towards parenthood can be a rich and transformative process if you take your time and advocate for yourself. Good luck to all those on this journey!


Hello, I can definitely relate to the struggles of choosing a fertility clinic and donor as a queer parent. One major consideration that I would recommend is looking for a clinic that has experience with the specific family-building method that you’re interested in. For example, if you’re interested in reciprocal IVF, where one partner provides the eggs and the other carries the pregnancy, it’s important to find a clinic that has experience with this method.

Another consideration is the cost. Unfortunately, fertility treatments can be quite expensive, and not all insurance plans cover them. Be sure to ask the clinic about their fees and what insurance they accept, and don’t be afraid to shop around a bit to find a clinic that fits your budget. Some clinics may also offer financing options or discounts for LGBTQ families, so it’s always worth asking.

If you’re considering using a donor, it’s important to think about what level of involvement you’d like the donor to have in your child’s life. Do you want an anonymous donor or someone who is open to contact? Would you like the child to be able to contact the donor when they’re older? These are all important considerations, and you should make sure to choose a donor who is comfortable with the level of involvement you’re interested in.

Ultimately, it’s important to find a clinic and donor who make you feel comfortable and supported throughout the process. Don’t be afraid to ask a lot of questions and shop around until you find the right fit for you and your family. Good luck!


Hi there! As a queer parent who has gone through the process of choosing a fertility clinic and donor, I’d be happy to share some insights.

Firstly, it’s important to find a clinic that has experience working with LGBTQ individuals/couples/families. This means that their staff should be knowledgeable, supportive, and welcoming towards queer individuals.

Additionally, it’s important to consider the specific services the clinic offers as well as their success rates. For example, if you need donor sperm, you’ll want to make sure the clinic has a reliable and diverse donor bank. If you’re considering IVF, you’ll want to look at the clinic’s success rates for same-sex couples. Don’t hesitate to ask the clinic for their statistics or any questions you may have about their processes.

When it comes to choosing a donor, the options can seem overwhelming. Make sure you are clear on both what traits are important to you and any legal considerations, such as anonymity laws. It can be helpful to use a donor matching service or to work with the clinic’s donor coordinator to narrow down your options based on your criteria.

Finally, don’t underestimate the importance of finding a clinic and donor who make you feel comfortable and supported. This is a big journey, and having professionals you trust and feel at ease with can make all the difference. Good luck!


Hello, fellow queer parent here. One important consideration to keep in mind when choosing a fertility clinic and donor is the emotional toll of the journey. It’s a very emotional time and can be very intense, no matter if the journey is smooth or otherwise.

It’s important to find a clinic that has a supportive and empathetic staff – a staff that may understand and help you navigate the emotional situation throughout the whole process. They can provide a listening ear, emotional support, and sometimes even counseling service can be very helpful.

Another thing I would like to add to the conversation is the possibility of opting for a known donor. This could be a trusted friend or family member who you feel comfortable with, and they are happy to donate. I took this path, and it worked well for me because it was comforting to know the person, but it also provided a more emotional connection for the child as they grew up.

Lastly, When choosing between different clinics or donors, you should take the time to really consider what is important to you, your family formation, and your future child. There is no one right answer - it is a very personal decision. Don’t be afraid to ask for information, investigate further, and take the time you need to make the decision that feels right for you. I hope this helps!

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